Darn!

So Matthew and Hannah left to Delaware today to see Matthews dad.

Trevor called George and told him Happy Birthday. He did not sound good on the phone.

It hasn't been REAL to me until today, that we are losing George. He will be going to be with Jesus sooner than we want.

Now I get all the statements, and know what I need to think and feel. "It is all in God's time", "God has a plan for it all", "Everyone has to die sometime (though this one is very rude)", " Be thankful he knows Jesus", and on and on and on. Why cant people say "It is ok to cry", "It is ok to be mad, Tell God that you are mad!!", and just let you feel like crap sometimes, not that i want to feel like crap but when your heart hurts, those fluffy saying dont help, you have to feel the hurt and work through it. You have to be able to cry and be mad and sad and irritated and everything, and get through those to really heal.

So as much as I love Jesus, and I know George loves Jesus and I know he will go to Heaven when he does pass on, it doesnt take the sadness away. The here and now sadness that he wont be here with us anymore.

I just cherish every day the Lord still lets George be with us and and thankful and honored to be his daughter-in-law because he is an amazing man of God, and his strength and courage and inspiring.